Bootleg Version Of "Riddick" Features Charming Subplot About Hapless Bootleg Filmmaker

Published Sunday, October 27th, 2013
Filed under Campus Life

Played by an uncredited but promising young comedic actor, the unnamed character of bootleg filmmaker is introduced in the first moments of the film as a blundering dullard who struggles with basic bootleg filmmaking tasks such as stabilizing the camera and focusing the lens on the movie screen.

“Honestly, I’m not a big fan of these big-budget action sci-fi flicks,” said Eric Tollson, who purchased the bootleg version of “Riddick” from a man in the park. “So I was pleasantly surprised by the addition of this goofy bootlegger subplot. I mean, how about the part where he finally starts filming ‘Riddick,’ and we realize the version he’s filming is inexplicably dubbed in Spanish? That was hilarious!”

He added, “Then Riddick killed a bunch of aliens I think. It was hard to tell, the video quality was very poor.”

This bootleg version of “Riddick” puts the character of bungling bootlegger both in front of and behind the camera. He appears occasionally as an anonymous finger that inadvertently obscures the lens, and at intermittent moments throughout the film as a voice that continually makes hushed cell phone calls in an unrecognizable language to characters whom we never meet.

“Who does this guy keep calling? Why does he think he can talk on a cell phone in a movie theater, let alone while he’s making a bootleg film? We’ll never know,” remarked Gloria Mallard, who also purchased the film in a park. “One thing’s for sure, when it comes to bootleg filmmaking, our guy really is a grade-A buffoon, but a loveable one nonetheless. Also Riddick can see in the dark maybe?”

Though this bootleg version of “Riddick” stays relatively true to its source, it departs dramatically from the original in the last five minutes. “Just when you think our bootlegging friend has learned his lesson and settled in to film the rest of the movie, his camera runs out of battery and the fate of Riddick and our boneheaded bootlegger is lost to us forever,” reported Allison Jackoby, who downloaded the film illegally on the Internet. “It’s an ending that seems to shrug with screwball ambivalence: the perfect button on this charming fish-out-of-water/sci-fi action romp.”

She added, “I wouldn’t be surprised if the creators thought about putting this bootlegger guy into the franchise proper. He’s a real hoot!”