“At first we were certain it was both, because duh. But then we realized that kinda wouldn’t make any sense, because Colombia is in South America and Britain is in Europe. Or like, near Europe,” reported cartographer and scholar Mark Edmond as he flipped his world map right side up, before flipping it upside down again. “So then we figured British Columbia at least had to be one or the other. Why else would it be called that? Seriously, what other reason could there possibly be?”

“Then we figured it was in England, because British is the first part, so maybe that’s more important,” continued Edmond, googling ‘British Columbia where is’ for the 10th time in a row, bewildered. “But it definitely isn’t, so then we came back to Colombia as an option.”

“It’s in fucking Canada?” Edmond cried out, astonished at the Google search results in front of him that brought his whole career as a cartographer to a screeching halt. “How does that even work? That’s so stupid, I’m pissed. Fucking whatever.”

At press time, researchers discovered New Mexico was neither new, nor in Mexico.