“For years now, we’ve been expanding Brown’s campus through extensive construction and renovation projects,” said Mitch Giatti, vice president for campus planning. “But we’ve finally realized there’s a better way to grow our campus: why not just get more of those big white tents?”

Putting up tents instead of constructing new buildings makes simple financial sense, Giatti explained.

“Construction takes months and millions of dollars to complete. But we can call in our big white tent contractors and have a space the size of Sayles Hall pop up in an afternoon. We can even get a tent with a hardwood floor and a heating system for a little extra money, or maybe string up some decorative light balls if we’re feeling fancy.”

Sources report that classes will start being held in a cluster of white tents on the Main Green in the coming weeks.

“Students can also look forward to the opening of the Big White Tent Refectory later this semester,” Giatti said. “We might even house our freshman class in a sprawling tent city next year."

At press time, the University announced it would demolish several historic houses around campus to make room for more tents.