“Don’t you hate it when a woman tries to talk to you?” Scuttleman said as Lingerman chuckled. “I hate my wife! Especially when she nags me about making my bed and brushing my teeth!”

“I shouldn’t have to learn how to do my laundry,” continued Scuttleman. “That’s women’s work!”

At press time, Lingerman’s children were uncomfortable with their father’s passionate defense of Scuttleman.