“Bob,” said Debbie, out of literally nowhere. “Hola. Soy Mr. Bob. And I am the manager of sloth kingdom. Ha.”

“Yeah that’s classic Debbie for you,” said her classmate Robin Marin, as she watched Debbie stick her tongue out and make a peace sign. “We’ll be in class and Debbie will just randomly blurt out something like: ‘Can I has a cheeseburger?’ and immediately everyone will just start cracking up. I mean, where does she think of these things?”

At press time, reports show that Debbie is literally so sad, it’s all a facade, and her mortal shell is carving to the touch.