“Sorry, Coco just gets excited by new people,” said Stacy as the large golden retriever intently thrust its wet nose towards the crotch of your jeans. “She’s like this with everyone!”

“Come on inside!” added Stacy, making no effort to stop her dog from charging between your legs and sticking its face in your crotch. “Coco, you silly girl!”

At press time, Coco was heading straight for Stacy’s other dog’s butt.