FDA Approves Drug For People Who Just Like Having A Little Routine In The Morning

Published Friday, September 5th, 2014
Filed under Science & Technology

“Countless people have been suffering from a lack of a nice little ritual,” said drug developer Randy Collins. “Routiplen was developed for consumers who crave routine, but not in a crazy way, just because it’s kind of comforting, you know?”

Routiplen’s bottle reads, “Take one tablet every morning when you get up, or after you take a shower if you think that would be a nice way to start the day.” Consumers were advised to “take Routiplen with food, or not. Whichever fits into your morning routine.”

According to Collins, Routiplen’s side effects include “just feeling kind of centered and ready for the day” and “being good at opening up a pill bottle and casually popping one in your mouth before heading out the door.”

The FDA also recommended talking to a doctor before taking Routiplen, because they might have some good ideas about starting the day off right, or maybe a Spotify playlist called “Gooood Morning!” they could share with you.

FDA officials noted that consumers should not take Routiplen if they already have a nice little routine in the morning, but added that it is safe to take Routiplen at night, maybe after brushing your teeth but before getting into pajamas and reading a chapter of a book.