Guilty Environmental Scientist Just A Little Bit Grateful For Global Warming On This Beautiful, Warm, Winter Day

Published Friday, March 8th, 2019
Filed under Science & Technology

“The sun is out and the birds are chirping," Dr. Carther smiled. "I can walk around in just a sweater… it’s just nice. Puts me in a good mood.”

“We’re experiencing a terrifying global ecological collapse,” he continued, "But it is SO nice to not have to wear a jacket. I mean I haven’t been able to sit outside and read for like, four months!”

“I’m not saying that I’m happy about global warming but I’m not not saying that I’m not not happy about it either,” Carther said. “I guess it’s just like, we should enjoy the lovely weather that comes with this irreparable, planet-scale destruction. Take the good with the bad.”

“All I know is that it’s the perfect day to drink iced coffee,” Carther shrugged, taking a sip out of his plastic straw.