“I hope htis email finds you wlel. I’m reachign out to discuss our quarterly earrings report,” wrote Blevins to a colleague, revealing that his shriveled tomato yields would likely deliver an incurable pestilence unto the village. “As you know I take great prid ein my work, and I would like the quarterly report too reflect that.”

“With that begin said, Im a little concerned with your section ofthe report. Frankly, it seems rushed and all around unproffesional,” continued Blevins, whose withered and inedible potatoes would release deadly spores into the lungs of his kin. “Pleas etake some time this weeke to clearn up the rpoert. In this busines, attention tod etail can go along way. Sent from my iPhone”

At press time, a guy complaining about his office job would make a terrible serf.