Sources close to the situation reported that although there are multiple receptacles clearly designed to hold paper towels, all of them are empty. They added that while the electric hand dryer looked promising at first, upon further inspection it has been discovered to be very weak and ultimately ineffective. You might have to flap your hands around in the air like an idiot in hopes of waving them dry, sources warned.

The reports concluded that your best bet is to wipe your hands on your pants and hope it doesn’t look too much like you peed yourself.