“Sure, I could spot it, easy,” said Robert Leponge, who last Wednesday attempted to solve the far lesser-known, age-old problem. “But when I went to grab it, YE- OWWW! Poke city!!”

“To be honest, I don’t even know,” said Leponge, when asked about his motivation for retrieving the singular strand of hay from the dense, spiny thicket. “It just seemed like an imperative.”

“Looking for it was like trying to find... I don’t know... something kind of easy to find actually,” added Leponge, whose body was covered in numerous small cuts and abrasions. “The real trouble was wading through all those needles.”

At press time, lightning had twice struck a flying pig named Snowball in hell.