“I mean, it wasn’t ha-ha funny or anything,” said student Chris Anderson as Feldstein beamed around the class from his podium, congratulating himself with a discreet fist pump and quietly muttering, “you still got it.”

“I thought he deserved at least a titter of acknowledgment, though,” Anderson added as Feldstein continued to glow radiantly, advancing through lecture slides with a sense of renewed vigor. "It must be exciting to win over a crowd with stock-themed puns."

At press time, Professor Feldstein was feeling triumphant following a weak round of applause on the last day of the course.