Following 11 years of extended conflict in both Iraq and Afghanistan, which claimed the lives of more than 8,000 U.S. and Coalition soldiers and cost the U.S. over $1.4 trillion, the War on Terror finally ended today as Terror admitted defeat.

“We can now be assured of the prolonged safety of our children, our families, and our loved ones,” said Obama during his speech. “Terror has at long last been defeated.”

The announcement prompted celebrations from citizens all across the country, as elated masses poured into the streets now confident in the security of their nation. “Terror is done,” said New Yorker Jane Fineman. “We’ve all been waiting for this moment and it’s finally here—the change is palpable.”

However, some were not as quick to celebrate. Yale Professor of History Jonathan Goodman stressed that there is still work to be done. “It’s never too early to discuss war reparations," he said. "How can we help that which we’ve been fighting rise from the ashes of defeat?”

When asked about the potential for further diplomacy between the U.S. and Terror, President Obama was cautiously optimistic.

“We can’t be too quick to forgive that which has perpetrated significant acts of violence against the United States,” the President said. “However, I have hope that, with a bit of work and a real humanitarian effort, we can bring Terror back to our side.”

Obama added that he hopes Terror might even, in the future, be an asset to the United States.

“In the coming years we can make Terror one of our greatest allies, both overseas and at home. I hope to see Terror come back bigger and better than before—and this time, it can be on the right side of history.”