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The Brown Noser

All Natural Deodorant Not Working, FDA Reports

Published Friday, December 6th, 2019

In a press conference last week, the FDA reported that all-natural deodorant is not working at all.

“Just because there is a photo-realistic artistic rendering of a pre-processed lavender bud on the label does not mean that this stuff will do the trick,” the report emphasized. “Look, someone had to say it,” the agency added.

“We know some of the other stuff has those carcinogenic chemicals and probably using aerosol cans is bad, but at least it works. Smelling better is worth the risk,” the report concluded. “If anything, you gotta reapply throughout the day, guys!”

At press time, the FDA was spraying AXE body spray into the air.

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