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The Brown Noser

Area First-Year Developing Pod Of 5-7 People Closest To Him In Ratty Line

Published Friday, February 5th, 2021

In accordance with the University’s recommendations, area first year David Sweeting is developing a pod with the 5-7 people closest to him in line for the Ratty.

“Forming my pod is not a decision I take lightly,” said Sweeting, inching towards the guy spaced six feet in front of him and preparing to strike up a conversation. “These are the only people that I can see without a mask for the rest of the semester. That’s why I’m only allowing those who are nearest and dearest to me in this lunch line to join.”

“A pod is an essential part of containing the spread of COVID-19 at school,” continued Sweeting, eagerly eyeing the girl behind him in hopes that he might be able to eat lunch with her every single day for the next four months. “You really need to have shared values and interests. My pod clearly already agrees about the best time of day to pick up lunch!”

“Sure, we aren’t allowed to go to most classes in-person, have parties, or hang out on the green," said Sweeting, drowned out as the people surrounding him began shuffling towards the Ratty doors. "But luckily my little group here can make our own fun! Right, guys? Ha, classic pod! Always on the move!”

At press time, Sweeting was asking his 500-person CS class if they wanted to start a weekly Zoom happy hour.

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