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The Brown Noser

Area Man’s Pod Just His Roommates, Friends, Friends’ Roommates, Roommates’ Friends, Roommates’ Friends’ Friends

Published Friday, February 5th, 2021

Sources report that area man Joel Kimmelman’s pod consists of just his roommates, friends, friends’ roommates, roommates’ friends, and roommates’ friends’ friends.

“I really only hang out with people in my pod,” said Kimmelman, a junior living off-campus, describing the wide range of social contacts that he deems are consistent with COVID-19 public health guidance. “So I only see my roommates and my close friends, and then sometimes my roommates’ friends when they come over, and my friends’ roommates when I go over to their places. And occasionally I see Marissa and Lori, who are friends of my roommate Brian’s friend Ella.”

“It’s hard not being around people anymore,” Kimmelman continued, texting a fifteen-person group chat to ask if they all want to get dinner later. “Hanging out with my pod really helps make this whole thing bearable. It’s just nice getting to see a few familiar faces: Paul, Aaron and Kelsey, Maxine, Hector, Rebecca and her roommate Corina, Izzie, Dustin, and some of Dustin’s friends. Getting together with them feels pretty safe, since we’re all in a pod.”

Kimmelman clarified that he occasionally sees people outside of his pod, but it’s okay because they’re getting tested.

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