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The Brown Noser

Area Woman Not Friendly, Just Flirting

Published Friday, September 13th, 2019

Area woman Michelle Ryder reported that she is not actually friendly. She was just flirting.

“The assumption that I’m being friendly just for the sake of being a nice person is really exhausting,” Ryder added. “I wish people would realize that I’m just trying to get laid.”

Ryder further explained that this is not a new problem. People often incorrectly assume she’s a really friendly, warm person when in fact she’s making moves.

“I’m not actually friendly at all,” Ryder explained. “Usually if it seems like I’m being nice, it’s because I’m interested.”

At press time, a guy at the bar was marveling at how refreshing it was to meet someone like Ryder, who is kind and friendly without any ulterior motive.

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