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According to a recent survey of on-campus publications, The Brown Daily Herald is not really all that “heralded.”
“Back in the day, a herald was an important messenger who brought news from far and wide to thousands of people,” said sophomore Miles Ellis, staring at an untouched stack of BDH papers from last week. “But the BDH isn’t ‘heralded.’ It brings narrowly focused Brown news to, like, three people.”
“It works for major newspapers,” Ellis continued angrily, shaking copies of The Chicago Tribune and The New York Times. “Tribunes and Times sound like important things, and tons of people read these papers. But does anybody read the BDH? Calling the BDH a ‘Herald’ just doesn’t seem factually correct. It seems like an insult to how news was historically communicated.”
“Even if more people did read the BDH, it doesn’t write important enough news to be ‘heralded,’” Ellis opined, scanning over yet another BDH article about UCS drama nobody cares about. “They should really consider renaming the newspaper the Brown Daily No-One-Gives-A-Shit.”
At press time, Ellis returned to point out that the Swearer Center is actually more off to the right, and not remotely profane.
