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The Brown Noser

Brown Basketball Team Showing up at Students’ Dorms To Ask Them To Attend Upcoming Game

Published Friday, March 9th, 2018

Explaining that they just saw the team making its way through Caswell, students confirmed that the entire Brown basketball team and coaching staff are knocking on students’ dorm-room doors and asking them to attend their upcoming game.

“We just wanted to let you know that we have a home game this Friday at Princeton,” said freshman guard Desmond Cambridge to confused resident Alex Laurens ‘18. “We’ve had an exciting season so far and we’d love it if you came out to watch our game. Feel free to bring your roommate, too. Please.”

“We play Penn on Saturday, too,” he added before handing Laurens a poster with their schedule on it and a free tee shirt.

“I’ve heard they’re doing great this year but I don’t know why they’re coming to my dorm,” Laurens said, explaining that the team and its coaches woke her up from a nap. “They must be really trying to get people to their games.”

The team has reportedly knocked on every dorm room in Pembroke, Hope College, Keeney, and Littlefield this morning. They plan on visiting the rest of the dorms by this evening, before trying all the dorms that were empty again tomorrow.

At practice, the team was sending everyone a personalized email to all of their professors asking them to come, too.

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