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Sources from within the Brown Concert Agency report that the student group is a fantastic example of how cool vibes and a niche taste in music do not make you an efficient manager of a massive student budget.
“Being a member of the BCA means you’re basically a Spotify Tastemaker for the entire Brown community,” said BCA member Sachè Green, lighting a hand-rolled cigarette from a stack of burning $100 bills. “And that is why it’s so important that we bring in wavy people who really, really like music.”
“My Spotify Wrapped this year was a lot of Japanese Yacht Rock, so you know I had to take a leadership role in the organization that brings music to the entire Brown community,” continued Green, standing on the Main Green, where the Spring Weekend festival will take place for only one day for the second time in 50 years. “My ‘why’ for what I do is about bringing in the new wave of the new wave of JPEGMafia for everyone to enjoy.”
At press time, the Socially Responsible Investment Fund’s Christmas Party proved that liking money does not qualify you to throw a party.
