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The Brown Noser

CS Concentrator Hopes Summer Sun's Vitamin D Carries Her Through Rest Of Year

Published Friday, September 14th, 2018

Returning to school sun-tanned and energized, senior Joanne Murphy is counting on the vitamin D her body produced during the last several months to tide her over until next year.

“Once I hunker down to work on my assignments, I doubt I’ll be getting any more vitamin D than what I brought back from break,” lamented Murphy, who hopes her summer dose will keep her bones from decalcifying while she pursues a degree in computer science.

“There’s really no way I’m going to make it out onto the Faunce steps or Main Green so it’s a good thing I planned ahead and squeezed in that two day camping trip," explained Murphy, as she headed into the CIT to start her Deep Learning assignment. "That active lifestyle is going to be the only thing between me and an inevitable descent into osteoporosis.”

At press time, Murphy’s body had depleted its reservoirs and was absorbing the meager wavelengths from an especially bright SunLab computer screensaver like a thirsty castaway desperately lapping up water droplets from a mossy rock.

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