After walking into a local deli and ordering a turkey club with “a solid amount of chipotle mayo on each side,” area man Doug Winter reported that the condiment wasn’t pulling its own weight. “I’m honestly just disappointed” reported Winter, “I was relying on the chipotle to bring some zing, but it looks like it just didn’t pan out. The lettuce is definitely giving me the crunch I needed, and at least this turkey is doing its job. But this mayo? Just not doing it for me. Absolutely no kick.” At press time, Winter had requested some jardiniere, hoping it could pick up some of the chipotle mayo’s slack.

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