Tuesday, November 24, 2020
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The Brown Noser

Couple Dreading Day They’ll No Longer Be Able To Use COVID As Excuse To Delay Wedding

Published Friday, October 30th, 2020

Engaged couple Tim Meadows and Carol Feldman are reportedly dreading the day they’ll no longer be able to use the pandemic as an excuse to delay their wedding.

“You know, when everything shut down I was like, thank God,” Carol guiltily revealed this past Tuesday, attempting to slide off the engagement ring stuck to her finger. “Now I’m just hoping the vaccine isn’t available anytime soon. I really don’t know what we’ll tell everyone then.”

“Tim and I want to encourage the American People to steer clear of masks and hand soap for the time being, really just until we can come up with another excuse to postpone,” Carol continued, happily shredding the invitations she had planned to send out before the outbreak. “I mean, I know this is a devastating time for so many people, but I just can’t imagine what Nana would say if she knew the wedding was off.”

At press time, Time and Carol were hoping that climate change would pick up the pace and flood their coastal venue.

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