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The Brown Noser

Desperate Student Begrudgingly Accepts Summer Job at Father’s Hedge Fund

Published Friday, September 15th, 2017

Unable to find something interesting to do over the summer, junior Jonathan Brewer reluctantly settled for a job at Brewer Capital Management, a $2.4 billion hedge fund run by Richard Brewer, Jonathan’s father.

Brewer explained that he had been hoping to get an internship in a DC political office or at a media firm, and had submitted many applications, but nothing had quite worked out. “At the end of the day,” he explained, “I had to choose between just sort of hanging out over the summer and working a mid-level position partner position at BCM. Eventually, I decided it would be better to have some structure.”

“It was a lot of grunt work," continued Brewer, complaining that he had to get up at 8 a.m. every day just to be bored most of the day. “It was al lot of mind-numbing calls with a couple Fortune 500 investors, managing this team of 5 or so investment researchers, and acting as the middle man for multibillion dollar deals I would get commission on. It was completely uninteresting but I guess better than nothing.”

“I guess I’ll just have to wait until next summer to do something cool," said Brewer. "Ugh, If I can’t find anything, dad will try to make me a senior partner or set me up with some other boring gig.”

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