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The Brown Noser

Farmer Still Not Quite Sure What Goat Is Good For

Published Friday, October 25th, 2019

Despite working on a farm his entire life, local farmer Hal Ankerson recently admitted he is still not quite sure what his goat is good for.

“Spending 30 years on the farm has taught me what most of the animals are used for,” said Ankerson as a goat gnawed on the corner of his shirt. “Cows are for milk, chickens are for eggs, and sheep are for wool. But the goat? I’ve never quite been able to figure it out.”

“I usually let my goats roam free so I can observe them,” continued Ankerson, the goat starting to pull at his pant leg. “All they seem to do is nibble at the grass all day. As far as I can tell they can’t even pull a plow or lay eggs. They appear to be totally useless.”

“I’m really not sure why we keep so many of them around,” added Ankerson, the goat now chewing on his rubber boots. “Right now, I have fifteen goats in the pasture right up over there and I can’t figure out what a single one of them is good for. It’s a mystery.”

At press time, Ankerson revealed he only recently discovered that cows were good for more than just their milk.

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