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The Brown Noser

Femme Fatale Wields Teeniest Tiniest Gun

Published Friday, April 14th, 2023

After an alluring night of illegal inheritance fraud and passionate eye-contact, Randol McShilling reports that the evening took an unexpected turn as femme fatale Ruby Stryker reached into her garter and pulled out the teeniest tiniest gun strapped to her thigh.

“Don’t tell me you are surprised,” said Stryker, pointing the two-inch-long pistol with a wittle trigger at her accomplice. “You were fun while you were convenient, but now is our time to part. The fun’s over, McShilling.”

“I didn’t even know they made guns that tiny,” said McShilling, staring down the itty bitty barrel. “It’s hard to be scared for your life when the gun is just too darn cute.”

At press time, McShilling convinced Stryker to put down the teeny weeny gun and instead light a looooooong cigarette.

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