"Food Review: Happy Dumpling
Do you a) smoke marijuana, b) drink alcohol, or c) engage in some other activity (illicit or otherwise) that leaves you craving a delicious, filling, and affordable snack late at night? Then Happy Dumpling is the place for you.
Generally, when one writes a review of an establishment, he can provide for you a number of statistics about it such as their menu, prices and hours of operation. The fact is, I don't really know these things and I'm entirely too lazy to go over there and check right now, but what I can tell you is that I truly adore their dumplings.
When you bite into one of their delectable bundles of goodness, the explosion of tangy flavor, delightful texture, and heart-stopping cholesterol that hits your taste buds seems to make the world stand still. It's as though there's a party in your mouth, and everybody's invited, but then the people who aren't cool and attractive enough are turned away at the door.
The ultimate joy that can be brought from a successful trip to Happy Dumpling is the deal. All week long, after 11 pm, Happy Dumpling offers a baker's half-dozen* dumplings for the meager price of two dollars. Yes, you heard right, two dollars.
In this crazy, mixed-up world that we currently inhabit, it is difficult to believe that a deal as pure and good as this one can still exist.
Too often in our lives have friends, family, and television advertisements promised us something that is truly great, with no strings attached, only to fall short and disappoint us in the end. And yet, despite our deepest cynicism, this deal endures as if to reassure us that there is still reason to look for happiness in the world.
Happy Dumpling isn't just an eating establishment; it's a battle cry for the oppressed of the world. After all, if dumplings this delicious can cost as little as two dollars, then can we truly measure the value of our lives with our bank accounts?
Above all, the Happy Dumpling guarantees us the most sacred of our God-given rights: the pursuit of
happiness.
*Seven"