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The Brown University Department of French and Francophone Studies recently announced an innovative new curricular plan consisting of increased time spent on reading, as well as the occasional beheading.
“We are so excited to take part in this academic endeavor that will surely improve our students’ comprehension of the French language and culture,” stated department head Marie Macaron, slowly running a whetstone across the blade of a guillotine. “For the 2023-24 academic year, we really want our language learners to step out of their comfort zone by spending an additional two hours on weekly reading, as well as casually visiting our guillotine every so often.”
“We kept receiving complaints from our students that our courses were not immersive enough,” continued Macaron, as she held up the head of a victim for the whole department to see. “But now, more than ever, any student willing to truly dive into French culture will have the ability and support to do so by reading some of the greatest works our language has gifted us. And also by making use of some of our best inventions.”
At press time, the Russian Studies department announced that their students would now be required to bring the means of production to class.
