Friday, November 16, 2018
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The Brown Noser

Freshman Going To Hold Off For A Couple More Minutes Before Texting Unit-Mate About Dinner

Published Friday, October 26th, 2018

Trying not to come on too strong, freshman Josh Maloney has reported that he’s going to hold off a couple minutes more before texting his unit mate to see if he wants to get dinner.

“I don’t want to seem overzealous so I’ll just wait it out for a little while longer,” reported Maloney. "I don’t want to text him too early. For instance, if we’re gonna eat at 7:00, no way I’m gonna text him before 5:00. I can text him right at 5:00, though, to make sure to get in there before he makes other plans. But then again, I don’t want to text at five on the dot since then it’s clear I was just staring at the clock, waiting to text. Yeah, I’ll chill until 5:17. Then I’ll text him.”

“And maybe he’ll text me first,” continued Maloney. “Yeah I should just wait a few minutes to see if he reaches out. But, you know, not that long because, really, I don’t mind being the first one to text. It’s not a big deal.”

At press time, Maloney was contemplating whether he should wait six or seven minutes before responding to his unit mate’s reply that he had already made dinner plans.

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