Partly Cloudy, 64°
Ryan Crowell ‘17 was gripped with panic yesterday, as he realized he could only maintain his fictional past as a Holocaust survivor for so long. “We were going in a circle, listing fun facts about ourselves,” explained Crowell. "The guy on my right said he grew up in Senegal. Shouldn’t have tried to top him. Stupid, stupid!" At press time, Crowell was Googling “Holocaust details” and writing his birthday on his forearm with black pen.
