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A new report has been published revealing that the “Give a Hoot, Don’t Pollute” owl can only be some sort of advanced sentient animal capable of understanding climate science.
The report, over 60 pages in length, lays the framework for the level of sentience required of the owl to both understand the pun contained in ‘giving a hoot,’ as well as the broader societal implications of pollution. Previously, owls were considered to be relatively average on the sentience scale, capable of basic-level functions such as predation and reproduction. This new revelation, however, turns that previous finding on its head, proving their must be at least one owl with a strong grasp on English wordplay and ecological function.
In other news, Smokey the Bear is not such a know-it-all now that his sign burned down.
