According to witnesses in the basement of Faunce, the guy who brought his own pool stick isn’t that good at pool.
“He just stared at me so intensely," said James Reines ‘18, after he was asked by the guy to play a game. "That dude looked like he was ready for action, and he had his own pool stick, too! I thought I’d get my ass handed to me for sure."
According to Reines, the guy unsheathed the halves of his stick and gingerly screwed the two parts together. He then proceeded to set up the balls, insisting that they had to be “perfectly aligned.”
Reines reported that within the first couple shots, it was obvious that he was better than the guy. “He kept saying, ‘Just not my day’ and ’What’s going on?’ when he scratched,” Reines said, adding that the guy kept chalking his stick between every shot like that was going to make up for his marked lack of skill.
When Reines sunk the eight ball to win the game, the guy immediately challenged him to another “with a quiver in his voice.” “I had to let him win,” Reines later admitted. “I was a little afraid of what he’d do if he lost again.”
At press time, the victorious guy was giving his pool stick a good waxing.