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The Brown Noser

Halfhearted Eagles Fan Flipping Bicycles to Celebrate Victory

Published Friday, December 1st, 2017

After watching the Philadelphia Eagles win their first-ever Super Bowl, witnesses reported that Philadelphia native and casual Eagles fan Joseph Carey celebrated by jogging around the neighborhood and flipping over a couple bicycles.

“This is cool,” said Carey, as he pushed over a bicycle and modestly pumped his fists. “Go birds!”

Carey told reporters that while the Eagles were never a big part of his life, he watched a bit of the playoffs and was happy that they made the Super Bowl.

“I really only tuned in later in the season when it looked like they would do well in the playoffs,” he said, adding, “and my girlfriend got me a Carson Wentz jersey when she was in Philly last month, so I really got into it.”

“It’s mainly just a way to connect to my city and my upbringing,” he said, kicking a trash can not hard enough to make a noise but not hard enough to knock it over.

Though Carey was recently seen on the main green trying to estimate how far he could climb up the flagpole, at press time he had decided against it, citing that it looked unsafe.

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