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The Brown Noser

Handshake Incredibly Wet

Published Friday, April 14th, 2023

Area woman’s Handshake with friend was incredibly wet. “It was almost unbelievably wet,” recalls Sarah Johnson, drying her hand with a paper towel, “not even moist, just…sopping.”

“First time I thought the bathroom was out of paper towels,” said Johnson recounting previous run ins with her friend’s wet hands, “but this has been happening for months, and he’s just getting wetter.”

“This last time his hand just slipped right out of mine,” said Johnson, now wiping her hands on her jeans, “It’s got to be a safety hazard at this point, they’re dripping enough to leave behind puddles.”

At press time, area man left chair incredibly warm after getting up.

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