Saturday, December 7, 2024
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The Brown Noser

“I’ll Be In The Ratty At Six” Says Student Massively Overestimating Sway In Group Chat

Published Friday, November 1st, 2024

A local student announcing their dinner plans has reportedly massively overestimated their sway in the group chat.

“Feel free to meet me there!” read the hopelessly naive text from sophomore Stan Karne, failing to convince even the hungriest members of the group chat. “I’ll be sitting at a table near the ice cream machine!”

“Guys it’s chicken marsala night, better get here before the lines get long!” triple-texted the guileless Karne, unaware that most of the group chat still hadn’t saved his contact. “Ice cream machine is broken but the brownies look good! Nvm, it’s the vegan ones.”

At press time, somebody else in the group chat asked who 5186 is.

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