Tuesday, November 24, 2020
Partly Cloudy icon Partly Cloudy, 64°

The Brown Noser

Jack-O-Lantern Peacefully Awaits Death On Parents' Front Stoop

Published Friday, October 30th, 2020

Knowing that it would soon begin to cave in on itself in a dramatic process of decay, a jack-o-lantern peacefully awaited death on area parents Wanda and James Allister’s front stoop this past week. “It knows what’s coming, and it’s okay with that,” commented the couple’s daughter, Jessica Allister, sizing up the gourd that unflinchingly embraced the circle of life. “It’s ready to slowly fall to pieces and be eaten by squirrels, bit by bit, until its remains blow away in the wind. It’s not afraid, no. It’s ready for what comes next, whatever that might be.” At press time, a nearby inflatable witch made itself comfortable in the front yard knowing it wouldn’t be taken down until December.

Article tools

Search The Brown Noser

  • Loading…