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A Jewish student was relieved to know his classmate’s antisemitic remark is not actually antisemitic after his Catholic friend Marcus insisted it’s not.
“That’s not antisemitic,” bluntly stated Catholic friend Marcus Brennan, despite knowing next to nothing about the historical plight of the Jewish people. “It was a harmless joke. Like, can we relax?”
“Phew, what a relief!” exclaimed Ben Levin, initially a bit concerned after a classmate made a flagrant blood libel reference before claiming that Jews dominated the banking industry. “I couldn’t help but be offended when I first heard that remark, but Catholic Marcus told me to not be offended and insisted it wasn’t antisemitic. And who better to be the arbiter of whether something is antisemitic than my Catholic friend Marcus? I’ve always said that guy understands the complexities of systemic discrimination better than anyone!”
At press time, a professor who ordinarily cancels class for Good Friday was going to be lenient and only assign a 12-page paper and take-home midterm over the Yom Kippur holiday.
