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The Brown Noser

Last Text From Dad Just Picture Of New Stamps

Published Friday, March 6th, 2020

This past Monday, Ainsley Anderson ’21 opened her phone to find that the last text her father had sent her was just a picture of his new stamps.

“It was just a blurry photo of a reel of stamps,” Anderson said. “I think there were birds on them? It was hard to tell."

Anderson’s father reportedly captioned the photo with “American Kestrel, 79 cents!!!” and a description of how he couldn’t wait to mail one to Anderson’s aunt Suzette because she "would really get a kick out of it.”

“I just don’t understand,” Anderson said. “I mean, he’s texting me this, right? So, he must know he doesn’t need stamps anymore, but he keeps buying them anyway.”

At press time, Anderson was seen reading a new text from her father that included a photo of his favorite fountain pen.

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