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Saying that he embellishes a bit to give him an edge in the job market, area man Todd Brinkley lies about being God on his resume. “I know employers are aware of this kind of thing, but I figure they’ll never actually look it up, so I decided to just tell them that I’m God,” Brinkley said, adding that he figured he’d try to attain a little advantage over other applicants by telling employers he is the omnipotent and omniscient creator of all things. “Companies are looking for hard-working, knowledgeable employees, and telling them that I’m the Lord our God will definitely show them that I’m the kind of employee who knows a lot and takes initiative. On the one hand, my being the Divine Creator of All Things will impress them, given that I’m capable of miracles, turning water into wine, etc. On the other hand, they’ll be intimidated, considering that I might also smite them if they cross me. It’s a small thing, and they probably won’t even notice it, but I feel better with it on there.” As of press time, employers in the New York metropolitan area had received over 10,000 applications from different Gods.
