Sunday, November 17, 2019
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The Brown Noser

Man Much More Fun In Emails Than Real Life

Published Friday, September 13th, 2019

Those who have corresponded with area man Alan Glass report that he is much more fun in emails than in real life. “His emails just had so much pizzazz,” said Julie Chu, a client of Mr. Glass’ realty firm. “Based on all of the exclamation points, GIFs, and words in all caps, he seemed like he would be an exciting guy with boundless energy, but in reality he was quite solemn. Even though he signs his emails off with ‘Cheers,’ I don’t think this guy cheers for anything.” Chu added that the smiling emoticon next to Glass’ name belied a deep sadness always present behind the man’s eyes.

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