Local man Louis Mitchell, who quite frankly has had it up to here, is only raising his hand slightly above his waist, sources confirm. “I’ve tried to be accommodating, but, to be honest, I have about this much patience left,” said Mitchell, spreading his arms far away from each other. “If I’m the only one taking what we’re doing seriously, I might as well just take all my things and go home right now.” A short time later, Mitchell reportedly agreed to stay and sit quietly.

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