Sunday, November 17, 2019
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The Brown Noser

Mom Pretty Sure She Knows That Actor From Something

Published Friday, October 25th, 2019

On the car ride home from the movies with her family, local mom Sharon Johnson muttered under her breath that she was “pretty sure she knew that actor from something.”

“C’mon you guys,” Johnson said, rapidly typing things into Google with one finger. “Remember that actor that was in the thing with the other guy in that other thing we saw a while back? I know you’ve seen it. We watched it together. Remember when we watched it?”

“Wait! I’ve got it,” Johnson declared, bumping up the text size on her screen to 500%. “He was in that one movie with Tom Cruise. Or was it Brad Pitt? Oh, one of them. And he did the thing, that really cool action shot? Agh, it’s on the tip of my tongue!”

Mrs. Johnson is reportedly still on the hunt. “His voice reminds me of that guy who did voice overs in those soda commercials we used to watch as kids,” she hissed through her teeth, scrolling through the deep recesses of IMDb. “You know which ones I’m talking about? But his face is exactly like that one guy on that episode of Downton Abbey I watched when I was sick. He was also in that thing with that lady pretty recently.”

At press time, no definite conclusions had been reached.

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