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The Brown Noser

NASA: Super Blood Blue Moon To Make Last Appearance Until Super Mega Ultra Blood Blue Moon of 2030

Published Friday, December 1st, 2017

The National Aeronautics and Space Administration announced in a Tuesday press conference that the Super Blood Blue Moon, the coincident total lunar eclipse and largest full moon on January 31st, will not be visible until a similar event in 2030, which they will call the “Super Mega Ultra Blood Moon.”

“We’re thrilled to present these findings,” said NASA Chief Scientist Ellen Stofan, referring to the product of several consecutive days’ worth of team research and computational modeling. “The Super Mega Ultra Blood Blue Moon, in layman’s terms, is going to be way, way sicker than even the Super Blood Blue Moon,” Stofan said.

“Which,” she added, “was already pretty sick.”

Stofan and a panel of researchers went on to explain that the Super Mega Ultra Blood Blue Moon is expected to be one of the most insane astronomical occurrences of the century, and that it will be “way bigger and bloodier” than this Super Blood Blue Moon.

“Remember how big last year’s Super Blood Moon looked in the sky?” Stofan said, “Super Mega Ultra Blood Moon is probably going to be, like, 30 percent bigger.”

“That’s literally huge,” another panelist noted.

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