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The Brown Noser

New "by HANK." Restaurant Set to Open on Thayer With All Red Meat Menu

Published Friday, March 8th, 2019

Sources report that a new “by HANK.” restaurant is set to open on Thayer in the coming months, offering an all red meat menu.

“by HANK. is going to be great for people with specialty diets," said owner Joe Stewart. "Specifically, diets that restrict them to eating red meat and red meat only.”

“We’re going to have a pretty comprehensive menu,” Stewart added. "Salads, burgers, tacos, quinoa bowls——but they’re all red meat!”

“One thing is for sure," he continued. "Meat will only be served rare at by HANK.”

As for decor, sources report that all knives will be steak knives and a sticky beer pong table will be hung in the restaurant’s front window.

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