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The Brown Noser

Nice Man Helps Old Lady Steal Groceries

Published Friday, April 29th, 2016

Walking by a senior citizen smuggling a handful of apples into her purse, nice man James Mason went out of his way to help an old lady steal groceries.

“I just saw a sweet old lady, Marsha, in need, and I did what any good citizen would do,” Mason told reporters as he shoved powdered mashed potatoes and hard candies under his jacket. “I never doubted it was the right thing to do.”

Mason told reporters it only took a few moments of his day to keep on the look out while Marsha fit a full glazed ham into her purse and that he’d do it again any day.

“I’m sure you would do the same,” Mason told reporters as he fit handfuls of prunes into Marsha’s pocket when the store manager turned around.

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