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The Brown Noser

Quarantine Will Finally Give Us Time To Finish That Birdhouse, Dad Reports

Published Friday, April 24th, 2020

With the COVID-19 pandemic putting millions of lives in danger and sending multitudes of students home to be quarantined with their families, your dad happily reported that the two of you will finally have time to finish that birdhouse.

“It’s all about finding the silver linings,” your dad said as he dusted off the half-finished birdhouse that you started building when you were twelve and abandoned two weeks later. “This whole coronavirus business is bad news to be sure. But hey, at least we’ll finally be able to put the roof on old Chez Sparrow, maybe even give it a nice coat of paint.”

Your dad also reported that this was the perfect time to really rededicate yourself to gaining a strong work ethic and finishing what you start. “It’s important to see projects through,” he said. “You don’t want to be someone who cuts corners and bails on things before they’re done. What if Abraham Lincoln had done that, huh? Now, let’s go find the wood glue.”

At press time, your mom was seen pulling out that old thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle that you could never quite finish.

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