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The Brown Noser

Ratty Adds Red Wine to Drink Dispensers in Attempt to Get Seniors Back on Meal Plan

Published Friday, March 9th, 2018

It was announced Thursday morning that, in an effort to get seniors out of their kitchens and into the dining halls, Brown University Dining Services (BUDS) is partnering with wine producer Lab for the remainder of the semester.

BUDS is touting this as a huge success for increasing meal plan subscriptions.

Currently popular amongst the undergraduate body for its boxed wine, Lab Wines’ products will be readily available in the Lactaid fridge. Sharpe Refectory Assistant Manager Sean DeBobes encourages people to consume however they most prefer. “We’ll have new plastic wine glasses, or students can take a whole box to their table and ‘slap the bag’ for themselves.”

The transition will rely on cashiers to check IDs at the door and provide wristbands to those over 21. “I’ve already practiced flipping two Brown ID cards, two licenses, and applying a wristband in one motion,” José commented, endorsing the program.

“Seniors think meal plan is a ripoff,” DeBobes predicted, “But these Lab dispensers are going to have them crawling back.”

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