A new report released last week confirms that three of your grandparents are doing fine.

“We have conducted a thorough and comprehensive review of the state of your family, specifically focusing on the soundness of your grandparents,” stated the report, referencing your Mom’s Mom, Mom’s Dad, and Dad’s Dad. “And we can confirm, without a shadow of doubt, that three of them are getting along absolutely swimmingly.”

“With a specific emphasis on personal well being, health, and vital signs, we posit that more than two and less than four of your grandparents are doing well,” continued the report, letting you know that three of them responded to the survey. “We hope this news reaches you well.”

At press time, one of the plane wings is flying A-ok.

Article tools

• Print
• Email
• Tweet