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In a hopeful scene out of Washington this past week, it was reported that despite it all, President Biden was still giving Office Siren.
“He’s still serving, you can’t deny it,” said former Secretary of the Treasury Janet Yellen as Biden strutted down the hallway, black Chanel loafers clicking seductively. “It’s pretty inspiring how hard he’s giving Office Siren despite everything that’s going on in this country.”
“Yesterday, I was bewitched by the delicate hint of collarbone he left uncovered by his silk button-up,” Yellen continued as she smelled the delicate scent of the President’s Dior perfume wafting seductively through the halls of the White House. “He really has been a living Pinterest board lately. It’s such a beacon of hope for all of us.”
“Things may be bad, but God, he’s making it look so good,” Yellen finished as she enviously eyed the curvature of his waist, covered expertly by his tailored blazer. “I hope in times of crisis I too can serve Office Siren with as much dignity and poise as the President.”
At press time, Stephen Miller was spotted giving Office Gorgon.
