According to a report put out by several of his close friends and acquaintances, local man Greg Stavig looks very stupid when he runs. “Look at that weird thing Greg is doing with his arms,” said co-author of the report Ali Manzoni, also noting that when Stavig runs he scrunches up his face like he’s constipated or something. “Why does he kick his feet out to the side like that? It’s like he’s a dying gazelle.” The report also indicated that Stavig’s stupid running form is surprising given that he looks incredibly sexy when he walks.

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